I Was a Pregnant Teenager

Posted on November 10th, 2015

Teen pregnancies are the sort of thing you wish was just a bad dream you could wake up from. And sometimes, no matter how much you wish this didn’t happen to you, it just did. When I first found out I was pregnant, I was in pure shock and felt like my world froze around me. The worst part was having to break the news to my parents. My parents, who thought I was their innocent, Sunday school-teaching, worship team-playing daughter. I almost would rather throw myself in front of a car than confront them with the news.

Abortion wasn’t an option for me. Did I think about it as a quick fix? Yes. Could I go through with it? No way.  I gathered up the courage to tell my mother. Thank God for my loving mother. She had compassion and mercy on me. Instead of pushing me away, she held me close and reassured me of her love for me.

At first, we thought the only option for a teen mother was to drop out of school to take care of the child. We braced ourselves for the future that was set before us. Then I watched God put together the peace He gave us that we sought: family counseling, which led us to Breath of Life Maternity Ministries. Adoption had never occurred to me as an option, but it revealed itself to me as the most beneficial choice! Not only could both the birth father and I continue to pursue our college degrees, but the child would be placed into a family who had been longing for the missing piece to their family;pParents who would love and cherish my child as their own, while in a stable and loving marriage covenant who had been waiting for who knows how long for this blessing to come into their lives.

Adoption was definitely the hardest choice I’ve ever made, but also the most rewarding. It broke my heart to give away a part of myself in infant form. Flesh from my own flesh, given away to fill the hole in someone else’s family. That’s a blessing in the end. Looking through prospective families was such a strange feeling. It was a great relief knowing that Breath of Life only had families that had completed a strenuous interviewing process and who the ministry trusted wholeheartedly.

God’s hand was so evident amidst this entire situation. What seemed to be chaos as I went into labor two months early actually allowed me to start college at UT the next semester instead of having to wait. I learned again that God always has the best in mind for us, even if it takes us some time to realize it after the fact.

We had an emotional and bittersweet placement ceremony at a beautiful church. As the months passed by, the adoptive parents, were so wonderful in sending tons of pictures and letters as Baby Sophie grew.

Close to Sophie’s first birthday, Jeannine asked the unexpected question, “Would you like to see Sophie this summer?” I was so shocked. I had braced myself for the 15- to 18-year gap before I was reunited with her, so this opportunity caught me in almost disbelief.  The arrangements were made and as I waited with Jeannine for them to walk in, I was anxious beyond description. As I saw the three of them walk through the door, tears poured down my face. I was so happy to see them all together, but at the same time it still seemed so surreal. The reality of such real love manifested in physical form before me just blew my mind and caused tears of joy and just pure emotion to pour out.  A whole year of recovering from a life-changing event, and then there before me stood my new family. One that I had hand picked to be the perfect, loving, and supporting family for my baby girl.

I wanted the absolute best for her and that’s exactly what she got. It blew my mind how perfectly God had prepared this family for Sophie.

Kyle, Alyssa, Sophie are part of my extended family now.  We see each other once a year and have a wonderful reunion. No longer do I see this as a mistake that ruined my senior year of high school, but as a miracle that God has changed from the biggest burden a teenage girl could carry, to the biggest blessing a girl could give to a family. Adoption is not only biblical, but sacrificial. It’s not easy making the choice, but it’s definitely one I will never regret.

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